34. Psalm 38- The burden of suffering

O Lord, rebuke me not in Your Anger nor Chasten me in Your Wrath! For Your Arrows have sunk into me before and Your Hand Has Come Down On me. Then there was no soundness in my flesh, because of Your Indignation there was no health in my bones, yea because of my sin. For my iniquities had gone over my head, they weighed like a burden too heavy for me. My wounds grew foul and festered because of my foolishness, so I am utterly bowed down and prostrate, for all the day I went about mourning. My loins were filled with burning, there was no soundness in my flesh. I was utterly spent and crushed, I groaned because of the tumult of my heart. Lord, all my longing is Known To You, my sighing is not hidden from You. My heart throbbed, my strength failed me and the light of my eyes, it also was gone from me. And my friends and companions stood aloof from my plague, yea my kinsmen stayed afar off. And those who seek my life lay snares, those who seek my hurt speak of ruin and meditate treachery all the day long. But I am like a deaf man, I do not hear them. Like a dumb man who does not open his mouth. Yea, I am like a man who does not hear and in whose mouth are no rebukes. All because for You, O Lord, do I wait, It Is You YHWH, my God, Who Will Answer. For I Pray, “Let them not rejoice over me, those who boast against me when my foot slips!” For I am at times close to slipping and pain does not avoid me. So I confess my iniquity, I am sorry for my sin. For those who are my foes without cause are formidable, yea and many are they, those who hate me wrongfully. Those who render me evil for Good are my adversaries because I follow after Good. So do not forsake me YHWH! O Lord, be not far from me! Make Haste To Help me, O God, Lord Of my Salvation!